Friday, March 09, 2007

Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Hasids)

When New York comes to Budapest, New York comes to Budapest.

I was already planning on meeting Mel and Ryan at the airport. As you can imagine, after hearing that Method Man and Redman were on their flight, I was hyped to see who would come off the plane. 20 minutes before the arrival of Delta Flight 98, JFK-Budapest, a small cluster of Hungarian Hip-Hoppers began to form: clearly the Wu Welcome Wagon. I waited breathlessly as tourists and Hungarian grannies and businessmen wandered off the plane.

Finally Redman burst through the baggage claim doors, thrust his wheely cart in front of him, hollered “What’s Up Budapest!!!” and gangster-leaned his way towards the ecstatic Wu Welcome Wagon. I waited for Method Man to emerge.

Little did I realize the best was yet to come: DOZENS AND DOZENS OF HASIDS wheeling two invalid rabbis in fur coats. The rabbis were so ancient that they looked a little like apple dolls, or slightly melted wax figures. Every once and a while the Hasidic flood was broken by a member of the Wu Entourage rocking expensive sweats and a massive wheely cart. It was like Duck Duck Goose: Hasid, Hasid, Wu! Hasid, Hasid, Hasid, Hasid, Hasid, Hasid, Hasid, Wu!

Mel and Ryan, as you can imagine, had a hilarious tale to tell. As their plane filled in New York, they realized the composition of their flight was as follows:
25 % Hungarian
25 % Tourist
25% Hasid
25 % Wu

Ever the gum-cracking girl reporter, Mel struck up a conversation with a couple young Hasids, who were on their way to a religious pilgrimage in Poland. She asked their views on the state of Israel and was told to listen to Sean Hannity. She also got her picture taken with Redman.

After deplaning (I love that verb) she tried to strike up a conversation with Method Man. He was distracted and withdrawn; he only grunted responses and wouldn’t meet her eye. He was compulsively shaking a jar, and she could hear something rattling around inside. Finally she ventured, “What’s in your jar?” He sighed with annoyance and opened his hand. Jelly beans.


jessamynit said...


Garth said...

In your opinion, if for some unexplained reason a brawl had broken out between the Hassidim on the plan and the Method Man and Redman entourage on the plane, who would have one? Let's assume that the other passengers and the waiting fans don't get involved.

Ganch said...

Ryan: The Hasids emphatically declared that they were peaceful and nonviolent, and so the Wu definitely would have won.

plankface said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
inna said...

wow, 6 blogposts in a row... you're spoiling us, girl :) i wish i could see pictures of this hip-hop-hasids tangle, but this might be one instance of words speaking a thousand pictures...

repeat performance of middle village at Barbes last night, keep 'em coming... we gotta premiere something at BAMCafe in June!

plankface said...

What I MEANT to say was:

You haven't answered the question on everyone's minds. WHY ARE METHOD MAN AND REDMAN IN BUDAPEST? Please, please tell me it's to film an Eastern European version of "How High"!

Ganch said...

Oh, dammit. I'm only going to disappoint you. They were just here for a show, which I didn't even go to because it was $40 (a fair price if you're making US money, but here that's almost 1/4 rent.) Boogers. Sorry there's not a better story for that.

Cute fish. Are they yours?

Seth said...

You didn't think to greet them with, "Welcome Wu-dapest!"

Carl Gancher said...

Sarah, this is Carl of Uncledom,
I just have to say that, when the Hasid and Wu mass reminded you of duck-goose, and you listed the cadence, I exploded with laughter.
It was a roaring river rapids laughter that went on for two minutes. I don't know why it tickled me so, but it did.
After that, I didn't realize that the story went on. I vote for no one getting stupid on the plane, but watch out baggage claim. And "Wudapest" next to best, after Duck-Goose.